Eeeny Meeny

The WiFi got turned off yesterday. I've been ignoring the bills because we've been working to accumulate that huge deposit needed when you first move into a rental house. Usually, AT&T turns the phones off, not the WiFi. Actually, they usually threaten first. We didn't even get a threatening email or letter. My ex-father-in-law once said to his son, "It's only money, Robert." When my bills are piling up around my ears, and my self-criticism is cruelly judging, I remind myself of that.

"How could it be that you get diagnosed with ADHD at 42 years old?" Good question. Maybe at some point in the future, this disorder will be called something else because it's hard to believe what's happening to me is the same illness that hyper little boys experience. We may both be suffering through executive function misfirings, but the symptoms are so different. As far as I can see, though, the treatment is the same. So, maybe that's all that matters. After Wylie was born, I had a setback in my career because I couldn't make my brain do the job. There were large documents full of medical terminology and my brain didn't want to slow down and concentrate on all those words. I drank as much coffee as I could to keep each protocol from spilling into the next, each chart color coded, and each patient distinguished from the other. I had such a hard time that I went back to my old therapist to ask if I could get neuropsych testing. She asked me, "...